Hestiaphobic anyone ?

My name is Yasmeen and I am a hestiaphobic!

I was surprised they have a name my  irrational fear, but then again they have a name for everything nowadays.  If you are anything like me, you are currently googling hestiaphobia, but have no fear I shall tell you - It is a fear of baking.  Yep, seriously, cross my heart that's what it is !  

I have decided to make a concerted effort to overcome this fear, to go boldly, or boldly go, where millions have gone before me - to start baking.

So after over 10 years in India on and off, I finally decided to take the plunge and buy an oven, not a nice big one like you get in firangi places, but a compact one (aka OTG)  that sits on top of the counter. Am renting a place and there's no space for a proper one and to be quite honest these proper ones are quite expensive and I'd rather use that dosh to go on holiday and make nice memories than spend it  on memories of burnt, non-rising, sunken in the middle cakes (which I am sure will result from my endeavours !) 

My repertoire of baking is limited to a single lemon cake I made many years ago.  A bunch of us used to get together for dinner parties on a regular basis.  Now when I say dinner parties I need to clarify.  It started with drinks, then dinner and wine, then drinks, then board games and drinks (whatever happened to playing Trivial Pursuit and Pictionary raucously after a few bevvies?), then philosophising over Baileys, then struggling with the sofa bed for those who picked the short straw for it (god those things were vicious), then waking up at 11am, full English brekkie then recovery the next day.....so where was I ?? aha the lemon cake, so I  decided to make this lemon cake as a surprise - but it never rose :(.  So I cut it up and served it as lemon flapjacks!! At least I'm inventive !

So why my hestiaphobia? I watch Masterchef and marvel at the ease at which they just throw a sponge together and then transform it into something spectacular (jammy gits !).  I sometimes spend some minutes watching those cake programs where folk have to make those monster constructions, but they don't keep me too interested as who in heaven's name wants a 5-foot cake covered in fondant and constructed for the most part out of rice-crispie bricks!

One of the 'powerpuff girls' bakes yummy stuff, my sis bakes amazing bread, a friend in Dahanu could bake for England .............everyone says just follow the recipe.  Yeah right !!  butter should be cold, don't overwork, make sure whites are peaky enough, make sure they are not too peaked, use melted butter, don't open the oven.  Maybe that's the problem I hate recipes, I am too scared to stray from them as far as baking is concerned as it's all to do with chemistry I've been told.  I'm quite happy to stray big time from stuff you make on the stove, subsitute this for that or don't worry about a missing ingredient - but baking is another story.

 I'm normally an instruction follower, I read through instructions even with a new phone.  Not that there are any instructions anymore ...what's with that ? Even if there are they have  those Ikea-like diagrams that are impossible to follow, they really need to stop employing artistically-challenged folk like me to draw these diagrams methinks.  Luckily I had my nephew here recently when I got a new water filter, I removed all the packaging, glanced at the instructions after hunting around for my glasses  and left him to figure out the putting together, which he did wonderfully.

I don't know...... it's irrational, but I'm going to bite the bullet and bake something and people are going to have to eat it whether they like it or not. 

If anything, I have to do it for the child, I mean what mother nowadays does not bake with her girl child.  In fact the other day I went to lunch at a friend's and her 12-year-old son impressed me with his baked brownies !!!  OK those who know me, know that I'm a pretty atypical mother of a young girl and have to work really hard to remember to get her girlie stuff and let her be girlie  - there are some things I can't change (a being non-girlie is one of them)  but I can learn to bake and I will bake even if it kills me and causes dodgy tummies to those around me.

So let's do it !!! I think I'll start with fairy cakes or cupcakes or muffins (easier to look upon many small disasters than a massive one)........I have the oven, I have the baking powder (got that yesterday) .............................uhm guess I'd better get on those shopping sites and order some baking trays huh (Lord I hate shopping !) 

 A bit of gyan !

 Fairy cakes vs Cupcakes